Monday, June 21, 2010

Can you top that?

Birthday parties for parents are one of the biggest social competitions of your child's upbringing. They are a public showdown to prove how much you really love and care for your little Charlie or Suzie.
Whose fairy bread is fluffier? Whose balloons float for longer? Where is the clown? Whose cake has more sugar?
Well, at least that's what most of the birthday parties I attended between the ages of 6-11.
But I have come to realise since my days of party poppers, things have changed.
I mean, really, picture this:
Your daughter is turning 10. She really likes MasterChef and TV Chefs such as Gordon Ramsay. So what is the logical answer?
Hellenic Republic for lunch, Press Club for dinner on the Saturday and on the Sunday Maha for Lunch and Maze for Dinner. For 20 people each time.

That is a lot of fairy bread.

Once more?
At 13th Birthday?
Your precious pumpkin takes a hot pink stretch limo from home to the up-market restaurant you've booked, where she and a table of 20 kiddies eat lamb spit to their heart's desire.
She is a adorned in a hot pink feather boa. Those feathers make it everywhere around the restaurant.

If parents are spending thousands of dollars on 10th, 13th, 1st birthdays or christenings, how much more will they spend on their kid's 21st or 18th?

Buy a jumbo jet and fly to LA where Miley Cyrus is waiting, hot pants and whiny voice at the ready?

Make her the first 16-year-old girl to fly into space in an aircraft sponsored by Ella Bache?

I understand you love them, but tell me how you're going to tell shnookums where their inheritance has gone, just in time for them to actually need something, like a house?

Show your children some self-restraint and say 'no' once every now and again.

It feels good to get that out.

1 comment:

  1. My cousin's 15th b'day party cost something like, R$100,000 (about AUD$60k). She had 3 or 4 different dresses and her own dance performance.

    Also, ever watched the MTV show 'My Super Sweet 16'? Fucking hilarious/heartbreaking.

    If you think feather boas are bad, this will make you cry.